Shortest line isn't always the quickest....

My weekly routine is groceries on Wednesdays. I almost always go the Grand Ledge Meijer and I always look forward to my cashier "John".
It took me a while to find my favorite cashier, but now, where ever I am I have certain characteristics and expectations that I look for.
I never go through the self check out unless I have 1-5 items, whats the point when you have a cart full of grocerys, 3 kids, coupons,a list, recycled bags and a cart that looks like a caboose. And I don't save any money, maybe I would if it took a couple of dollars off my bill.
When John is working it doesn't matter how long his line is because it always moves fast but if I have to pick a line I first look for my cashier and then look for large bulky items, not small crap that's strategically piled up.
I've broke down my cashier characteristics (things you should look for, for the most efficient and fastest way to get you in and out)

Lets start with Guys.

Young guys, I don't go for any guy that's good looking(which is rare). Usually they are too busy trying to make conversation and I'm too distracted and I don't pay attention to the bill and they pack things really stupid. Cilantro and Lettuce should never have cans stacked on top of it. If I do decide on a youngin then I like the ones that look quiet, maybe they play video games:) , kinda geeky, ...like i can beat them up:)

Middle age guys(30-50), this is usually what I'm looking for. They are usually talkative but not too much and they are always great packers, no awkwardness, they get "it". That's my John!
(Don't worry I'm not getting all hot and bothered with John, he has a boyfriend)

Young girls, I like to go with girls that are pretty but not too pretty and smile. I've noticed when they are too pretty they don't talk and pack way too light. Yah, total discrimination with the looks but I think alot of people are pretty:)

Middle age women(30-50), watch out for the "talky pants", if you are having any inkling of this, get out of the line fast. I'm fine with some talk but I don't want to tell this person every dish that I'm making and how I make it and explain what all my vegetables are(they always ask about beets and snow peas?????, I don't get it) and blah, blah, blah. They usually take forever and pack too light. Also look for a "kind" face, no scowling and says Hello.

Senior Cashiers(seems to be very rare, they usually stick them at the door) but when you find them, I look for ones that look mean and feisty...fast and efficient!

So hopefully this will help with your cashier roulette...

Save big bucks, no whammies!